Things I’ve been doing lately include:
Spending a lot of time with my cat
And reading cards for Inez.
Some other things I’ve been doing lately
Sleeping more than I should
Taking some pictures
And trying to write everyday,
A little or a lot.
Some things I’ve been doing lately
Pretending to be ok
While thinking everyone else is.
I’ve been listening to too little music
And thinking thoughts in a loop
That’s become entangled like an awful knot of yarn.
I’ve been spending time with trees,
Avoiding most people
And trying to figure out how to quit my job.
I’ve been estranged from the call,
And left strangled
Which is making me have to swallow my voice
On more occasions than is ok with me.
It’s making me angry
At little things like the kitchen being messy
Or too many red lights.
Something I’ve been doing lately and,
This one gets me the most,
Is trying (really trying) to talk with people around me
And realizing I’ve gone aphonic.
I planted some things,
Decided to get a radio to put in the kitchen
And started letting myself feel how I feel
Instead of going on the internet to look at other people’s lives.
Now I think,
I just need to dance in the morning,
Show my teeth more often,
Find out who’s hands are around my neck
And go from there.